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  • Writer's pictureBelieveinyoucounselling

Believe in you....

As I sit and write this blog, I am reflecting on the times I have found myself procrastinating and putting things off because of fear and anxiety. In today’s social media world, we leave ourselves open to judgment, not just from people we come into contact with in everyday life, but from people all over the world who have access to what we share via the internet.

Is it just a coincidence that with the rise of social media use, there has been a rise in people accessing mental health support and suffering with issues such as anxiety? I remember when I first opened a Facebook account and connecting with people I hadn’t seen for over 10 years, I compared myself and my path, when I saw where their path had taken them, the progress they had made compared to where my path had led me and feelings arose in me of, I’m not good enough.

We see other people’s lives through a filtered lens of what they want us to see, which can result in us comparing ourselves and our achievements to what we think we “should” be achieving, which can stir up deep rooted conditions of worth such as, “I am only good enough if…….” It can leave us trying to live up to unrealistic expectations and punishing ourselves, when we are not able to achieve something that is not achievable, because it isn’t real.

It can also lead to holding back, not sharing who we really are because of fear of judgment, ridicule of not being good enough. How do you feel when you share something about yourself online and it doesn’t seem to get many likes? I know I have felt disappointed, questioning why someone with similar post has more likes, asking myself what I did wrong? Then when I really thought about it, I realised that it may not have anything to do with the content, there could be any number of reasons, it could be just down to the way social media page works and who they choose on your friends list sees it.

For me, I have learned to accept there may be people who don’t like or agree with what I share, they may even post comments sharing their views, sometimes they may be valid, sometimes they may not, it may hurt, but I try and reflect on what it was I shared and the purpose behind any comments made and what the intention of the person may be.

The world is changing, there are pressures on people today that were not around 20 years ago, believe in yourself, the things you believe in and feel passionate about. Not everyone will like or agree with you and that’s ok, just as you won’t always agree with other people’s views, sometimes listening to other people’s views, will enable you to re-evaluate your own and either affirm or change your feelings towards them, things change, people change, we are forever learning and evolving, what’s important is that you are kind to yourself, take the risk to share who you are, your thoughts and feelings are valid, even if not everyone agrees with you.

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